Wednesday, November 6, 2013

Yolanda Renée—A GLAMOROUS LIFE




I asked Sia what topic she wanted for this post and this is what she suggested:  
"Remember they don’t see us in our ratty jammies, torn jeans, growling and cursing at everything, or with no makeup, and our hair looking like a herd of horses ran through it. Thank God for that, right? They see you as your author pic shows you and the online personality you've developed.
 "To your readers you’re a glamorous author. Okay, quit laughing," she wrote.
 
I was laughing, because glamorous means exciting and desirable and my life is anything but exciting or desirable.

A framed picture from
Sia's office
I live in an old house in constant need of repair, go barefoot in the summer, and wear socks, sometimes several pairs, all winter. And yes, I write in my nightgown. Sometimes I'm so caught up in the process, it's afternoon when a knock at the door reminds me I'm half naked, still have bed head, and have forgotten to eat! Almost daily, I pick up socks from the living room floor, a discarded pair of jeans from a kitchen chair, and underwear from the most curious of places. My hubby has a habit of shedding clothes as soon as he walks in the door, and since I love him, I don't nag, at least not any more. He has to deal with my writing moods, and that's an even exchange for sure.

Just recently, I helped my son take an air conditioner out of his window and capture stinkbugs by the dozens as they sought the warmth of our house for shelter and hibernation. The word yuck, doesn't describe the chasing down of the little buggers or the smell if you accidentally touch them, and don't even consider smashing them. Their odor is almost worse than a skunks. We captured them in empty plastic bottles, where they suffocate in their own bouquet. Getting rid of stinkbugs is a horrid job and one that gives me the heebie-jeebies, simply because bugs are just so, so gross!

Does any of that sound exciting or desirable? Yet many folks see it all another way. I did too, once, after all authors are revered, not as much a rock stars or some movie stars (if you measure it by screaming hordes of fans) but they do appear as guests on television talk shows, act as consultants on movie shoots,  and the more successful ones have bank accounts in the millions. The pinnacle of success, money in the bank, and while it's a dream we all share, it's a vision few of us will achieve.

I'll bet the life of most writers is not far from mine. Therefore, while the life of a few of the most successful authors may be glamorous, most of us are just regular folk.


Although occasionally, something cool does happen, and it touches the ego, right where a writers ego needs to be touched. Just this week I handed a very nice lady my business card and a bookmark for my most recent release. I asked to speak to the manager, and told her about my book, and that I wanted to arrange a book signing. She gushed, and I do mean gush.

"Oh my gosh, you're an author. Really! It's so exciting to meet an author."

And I'm like, "It's so nice to meet someone who thinks so." I laughed, but it was.

At our favorite restaurant the other night, the cashier says to me. "Are you that book lady?"

So for me, in between scrubbing toilets, dusting, vacuuming, and laundry, I keep trying to convince folks that I've written a book they can't live without, therefore, while glamour would be nice, it's certainly not reality!

I'll know I've arrived the day I can hire someone else to do the mundane for me! I know, keep dreaming, but if all I get from my glamorous writing life is to be known as that book lady, I'll take it!

Well folks, that pretty much describes the glamorous life of this writer, what about you, what glamorous tale of success, or ego boost, can you share?


                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                         


BUY:  AMAZON, B&N, KOBO

MEMORIES OF MURDER

Decades ago, the seeds were planted...

Today, dark, fathomless eyes rake the image before him. One final task and the transformation is complete. Steady fingers screw intricately carved horns on each side of a stiff brow, and a gargoyle suitable for Notre Dame scowls from the smoky mirror in satisfaction. A jagged smile rips through his smooth, hairless face, and inked, reptilian scales caress his naked body. A laugh of hideous resonance emanates from his gut as the demons of hell welcome Lucifer into their fold. 

In a dungeon-like chamber, his Lilith awaits. The kidnapped daughter of a nun, groomed to fit the final piece in the complex puzzle for world domination. Will Lucifer marry his bride, on the summer solstice?

Only two things stand in his way. His greed... ...and Detective Steven Quaid.  
EXCERPT

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                         

Yolanda Renée really wanted to be a drummer, or a racecar driver. Obviously she's neither, but they are on her bucket list, that, and owning her very own fire breathing dragon!

Renée claims to have always loved books, and that it was through books that she escaped and experienced all the things she'd only been able to dream about. Through the stories, the characters, and the places created by talented authors, such as Caroline Keene, Margaret Mitchell, and Stephen King. She now reads K J Larsen , Jennifer Hillier, Joanie McDonell, J D Robb, and well, pretty much everyone and anyone who gets their words in front of her! SHE LOVES BOOKS!

Renée says she's always been a writer, and that making things up gets her through the day - a crazy imagination is a good thing - right?

An adventurous spirit took Yolanda Renée to Alaska where she hiked the Brooks Range, traveled from Prudhoe Bay to Valdez, and learned to sleep under the midnight sun.

She claims her vivid imagination as a blessing, a habit, a hobby, a calling and sometimes a curse.

Renée now resides in Central Pennsylvania with her husband, two sons, and Boston terrier, Patches.

You can find Yolanda: